Obituary of Mary (Mae) Margaret Dellner

Mary (Mae) Dellner, 92, of Whiting, passed away Wednesday, February 10, 2021, in Toms River. Born Mary Margaret Garahan in New York, NY on May 7, 1928, she always found joy in life even if sorrow found her; her smile and spirit were a bright star. Mae graduated from Textile High School in 1945 and went to work for Bill Brothers Publishing Company in Manhattan, eventually becoming assistant to the comptroller. During these years, a first marriage to Virgil Lynch ended in divorce before she met the love of her life, John William Dellner. They married in 1960 and moved to Brooklyn, NY. She stopped working for Bill Brothers when her first child, her daughter Jennifer, was born. Afterward, following John’s transfer by McGraw Hill to NJ, they resided in Yardville, where she gave birth to her son Mark. She was a wonderful mother to her children and full partner in life to John. People remarked on how in love and happy they were, and it was true and never changed. Far from her familiar city territory, she learned to drive again in earnest, making sure Jennifer and Mark had a childhood of Girl Scouts, Cub Scouts, summers at the beach, swimming lessons at Gropp’s Lake and more. Her home was the center of decades of Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations with extended family and friends; being together meant the world to her. When her children were teenagers, she went back to work as an administrative assistant at the Hamilton Township School District and served as a tour guide at Kuser Mansion. She and John moved to Crestwood Village II in Whiting in 1987. From the time Mae was a teenager learning to dance at Boys’ Clubs during the war through the very latest years of her life, she loved music and she loved to dance. She sang while making dinner every night when her family was young; she could not be kept off a dance floor at a wedding or other celebration. She and her late-in-life partner Bill Yates made the most of many a Crestwood dinner dance. She participated in amateur theater in Hamilton and Crestwood. She loved to read; she loved long walks, the ocean, Harry Wright Lake, and never lost her love for New York City. She conquered her fear of flying to visit her daughter in various faraway places in the US; at seventy, she rode shotgun for a three night trip in a Ryder truck when her daughter moved from Ohio to Texas. She loved seeing what she had not seen before. She loved her granddaughter April with all of her heart; she loved spending every weekend with her during her childhood and watching her grow. In her very last years, Mae found music and laughter and a good deal of dancing at the Regency Memory Care Club in Toms River. Her family will always be grateful that those who looked after her there made it possible for her to still have meaning and joy in her days. Mae was predeceased by her husband, John William Dellner, her son, Mark Garahan Dellner; her dear companion Bill Yates, her beloved sister Virgie McGann, her two stepsons, John Jr. and Peter Dellner, her niece and goddaughter Dale Garahan, and many others whom she loved. She never forgot the family dog of the family’s Yardville years, a beagle named Hunter; Ranger and Grizzly, special cats of more recent times, were still very missed. She is survived by her daughter, Jennifer Dellner; her step-daughter, Barbara DuCharme; her brother, Thomas Garahan; her granddaughter, April Dellner; her former daughter-in-law, Lisa Hluchy; her niece Dawn Cavalcante; her step-grandchildren and grand-niece and grand-nephews and their children. Visitation will be from 11am to 1pm, Monday, February 22nd at Manchester Memorial Funeral Home, 28 Schoolhouse Road, Whiting. A short service will be held toward the end of visitation hours. Interment will follow at Brig. Gen. William C. Doyle Veterans’ Memorial Cemetery in Arneytown. While flowers are certainly welcome, please know that your kind wishes and prayers are enough. If you like, in lieu of flowers, donations in Mae’s memory may be made to The Cure Alzheimer’s Fund via their website, https://curealz.org/ or Alzheimer’s New Jersey, 425 Eagle Rock Avenue, Suite 203, Roseland, NJ 07068 or their website, www.alznj.org ; or Summit Animal Rescue Association, P.O. Box 124, Berkeley Heights, NJ 07922 or their website, https://sararescue.com and would be greatly appreciated by her family.